Evolving Beginnings.

Life is a funny thing. It's a very unstable inconstant thing. In this world you can't be the same person all the time; you need to evolve. It's hard for me to believe that we can stay with people for a long time because we are always changing. As time progress eventually you and that other person won't be on the same page. Your interest, your hobbies, nothing will line up anymore and that's one of the hardest things to accept. 
 I know I'm always recreating myself. Usually by finding new hobbies. If you talked to me two years ago I would have told you the internet was a scary place and I just wanted to write poems. Now if you compare that to present me, I think the internet is the most free thing the world has and the most powerful. I've started doing everything online because I see a potential. Either it being fan accounts on tumblr, or just a blog that makes no sense to anyone. I spend a lot of my time finding new bands and writing stories that are more magnificent then I'll ever be. What I learn from that is I'm losing a lot of people because I can't keep old conversations going; so I find new friends.
 I wrote this line in one of my stories, "Because that's what we do Arizona! We build these people in hope their lives will be better then the last ones we wrote. They never are, they just get more twisted and twisted as we never finish our sentences." I like this line because I think as humans we are trying to live this extraordinary story. But most the time that's a nonexistent reality. So you alter yourself more and more trying to make that into a reality. 
 I think why we change so much is because we keep envisioning alternate versions of how we want our life to play out as. For me I want to write books, scripts, and possibly direct. Now I'm not sitting here wanting to be the next John Green or Steven Spielberg because I don't desire a name in lights. I just want small connections with people who enjoy my ideas. And if that comes with names in lights it would be incredible but not all I want in life. But of course, in a number of years it might be a different story. 
 We're in a world that idolizes being true to yourself but doesn't really mean it. Because we hate the idea of people changing but, if we don't change we'd get pretty bored. When you think about it, you change if you start liking one band more then the other, or prefer a curtain food over another. That's evolving and if you hate when people change, it's like telling them they can't like pepperoni better because they claimed at one point cheese use to be their favorite. 
 I'll admit, change is scary but change is wonderful. If you live and do the same thing over and over again their isn't a thrill factor to you. So do what ever the hell you want to do because life is filled to the rim with beautiful or tragic opportunities. So find that happiness either it being with people you known or will know. So don't stay grounded in terrible friendships or relationships because of the fear of new beginnings. Beginnings are ruff, very ruff but life wasn't meant to be easy. Do something you thought you'd never do, even if they're small things like starting a blog. Don't let people tell you what you need to succeeded in this life because succeeding is happiness. And happiness is your own freedom. A freedom only you can find. So let go and breathe because when you find you and find your happiness nothing is going to stop you. And if you let them stop you, then that wasn't your happiness.